Welcome back, everyone. I apologize for missing my promised upload date for this post.
Over the last two parts of this series, we’ve covered how decisions made in the film adaptations of Order of the Phoenix and Half-Blood Prince contributed to the Deathly Hallows films feeling confusing and cluttered. Please review Part 1 and Part 2 first so that you are fully caught up, as we are going to jump right into Deathly Hallows.
A New Story (continued)
The Deathly Hallows: Part 1
Scene: In Memoriam
Rather than just having Harry fiddle with the broken piece of Sirius’s mirror, Harry should reflect upon the broken mirror and Sirius’s note, perhaps with a shot similar to the one dedicated to the locket and Regulus’s note. Then we could get a moment of surprise as he looks into the mirror and sees Aberforth’s eye. He bumps into his dresser, startling Hedwig.
HARRY: It’s okay, Hedwig. I know. They’re both gone.
It’s a tad heavy-handed, but it will explain to the audience what they just saw. After this, Harry can pack up the mirror shard with his other items.
Also, in this scene, Dumbledore’s obituary (which is briefly visible on the copy of the Daily Prophet) will be authored by Xenophilius Lovegood, not by Eliphias Doge. I will explain more when we hit the wedding scene.
Scene: The Seven Potters (and Fallen Warrior)
As stated in Part 1, I believe that Bill and Fleur should be cut from the films, with their roles in the story begin used to give Lupin and Tonks a bigger part in the story. They will be replaced in this scene with Cho Chang and Xenophilius Lovegood. Cho is here for a bit of a redemption moment after Order of the Phoenix denied her reconciliation with the others (despite acknowledging that she was under Veritaserum when she betrayed them). Xenophilius is going to be taking an expanded role in this version of the film, so he’s being introduced early.
Xenophilius will introduce himself in this scene much the same as he did in the film: by getting deep into Harry’s personal space (putting Harry’s face right up against the Deathly Hallows necklace) and assuring him of the ongoing support of the Quibbler. He’ll be taking Fleur’s role as a fake Potter. Rather than the “I’m hideous” gag, Xenophilius will make some remark that showcases his eccentricity, such as this:
XENOPHILIUS (DISGUISED AS HARRY) [Tugs at his ears]: Has anyone ever told you that you have Peverell earlobes, Mr. Potter? Very promising. They scare the nargles away, you know.
The absence of Bill and Fleur will also remove of Lupin and Tonks’ wedding announcement, but since they will be taking over the actual wedding, that line isn’t necessary.
This scene also includes the reintroduction of Mundungus. Since he would have been introduced in Order of the Phoenix, the part of his line where he gives Harry his name can be cut.
The Trace is mentioned in this scene. Since the films don’t explore Harry coming of age, the reference will be dropped from this version of the film. Moody can simply say that there are Death Eater spies in the Ministry, so they want to avoid transporting Harry via spells so that the Ministry can’t trace him as he’s moved.
Scene: The Wedding
The obvious change here is that Lupin and Tonks will be the ones getting married. However, that is not the full extent of it.
As stated in Part 2, the films fail to fully explore Dumbledore’s backstory, despite leaning on it as much as the book to drive forward the plot. I would love to see this complex backstory properly explored, yet the Deathly Hallows films have enough going on without fully exploring the psychological impact that revelations about Dumbledore have on Harry. So, rather than calling Dumbledore’s past into question using Doge and Ron’s grandmother, we’ll use Xenophilius to feed Harry information.
Harry will encounter Xenophilius and Luna at the wedding. Rather than trying to talk to Doge, Harry will instead approach Xenophilius to thank him for writing Dumbledore’s obituary (at which point we can get that charming interaction with Luna). After Luna moves along, Harry and Xenophilius can chat about Dumbledore.
HARRY: I didn’t thank you the other night for what you wrote about Dumbledore. I found it really moving. You obviously knew Dumbledore well.
XENOPHILIUS: Well, I certainly know people who knew him well. I’ve had no small number of chats with his brother, Aberforth.
HARRY: I didn’t even know he had a brother.
XENOPHILIUS: Ah, well, Dumbledore was always a very private man. Outside of Aberforth, I suspect the only person who knows his full story is Bathilda Bagshot.
HARRY: Who?
XENOPHILIUS: The magical historian, Mr. Potter. She lives in Godric’s Hollow – not far from where your parents lived, as a matter of fact. She knew Dumbledore when he was a boy.
HARRY: You’re saying Dumbledore grew up in Godric’s Hollow?
XENOPHILIUS: That is what I said, is it not?
HARRY: I didn’t know.
XENOPHILIUS: We never truly know anyone, Mr. Potter. Everyone has pieces of themselves hidden away. An outsider can only find them if he looks.
It’s not Shakespeare (or, rather, Rowling), yet it sets up Godric’s Hollow as a place for Harry to visit later in the film without leaving Dumbledore’s past as a dangling plot thread.
Scene: A Place to Hide
Since both the Trace and the Taboo are being dropped from this version, there’s no benefit to having Harry and friends fight Death Eaters in the café. They should go from Apparating to Tottenham Court Road to hiding in 12 Grimmauld Place.
Scene: Kreacher’s Dobby’s Tale
Dobby will be the one hiding in the kitchens of 12 Grimmauld Place. (As in Order of the Phoenix, he will be eclectically dressed, if a bit shabbier.) He can relay the same information about Mundungus ransacking the house and stealing the locket that Kreacher does. Given that this is Dobby, this scene will be played as being sadder and less grim than with Kreacher. Additionally, as part of explaining that Mundungus stole the locket, Dobby will list a few other things that Mundungus stole, including the mirrors and the silver.
Scene: The Bribe
Dobby will then bring Mundungus back by himself. However, what Harry is doing prior to that return will be different. We’ll get a short snippet of him coming back into the house under his Invisibility Cloak. He tells Ron and Hermione that he couldn’t get into Gringotts to get his own money, let alone figure out if a Horcrux is there. Then he begins toying with the Snitch, at which point Hermione mentioned Snitches having flesh memories.
Scene: On the Run
This montage, as it exists in the film, works for what it is trying to accomplish. It effectively sets up Ron’s mounting frustration and the dire state of the world. In this iteration, this scene will be extended to incorporate the hunt for Horcruxes.
Intercut into the scenes of wandering will be snippets of Harry and the gang visiting places connected to Voldemort: the orphanage, his parents’ house, the graveyard. These would be supported by lines of dialogue where Harry and Hermione identify each location for the audience and confirm that there isn’t a Horcrux there. I’d also recommend throwing in a visit to Diagon Alley (under the Invisibility Cloak) as an alternative to the ruined trailer park, so that we can see firsthand how the Wizarding world has been changed by Voldemort and reiterate Gringotts as a potential Horcrux site. At some point during the montage, there would be a clip of Harry pondering the shard of Sirius’s mirror and seeing Dumbledore’s eye in it a second time (preferably, as the point where Ron asks Hermione if Harry knows what he’s doing).
All the while, the background audio would alternate between the radio broadcasts and Harry chanting, “The locket, the cup, the snake, something of Ravenclaw’s … The locket, the cup, the snake, something of Ravenclaw’s …” We would also get a line from Ron, asking how they’re supposed to destroy any of these Horcruxes when they find them.
Some of the elements actually were in the film at some point during development. A deleted scene before the montage sees Harry and Hermione discussing the known Horcruxes while Ron is bedridden from the splinching. This is also the scene that establishes the existence of the Taboo. The second scene seems to come either at the end of the montage or after Ron reunites with the gang (the timing is a little hard to determine from the footage). Aside from a cute bonding moment between Ron and Hermione, the scene also shows Harry toying with the mirror and seeing Dumbledore’s eye.
The deletion of these scenes makes me wonder how tight the production schedule was for Deathly Hallows Part I. While I agree with the decision to cut the scenes themselves, there were things that could have been salvaged. The eye moment would have easily been cut into the montage as-is, and the discussion of the Horcruxes could at least have been reintroduced with ADR.
Scene: Bathilda’s Secret
While that the subplot of Dumbledore’s past is being trimmed out, I think that Hermione finding The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore in Bathilda’s house can stay. The audience will remember Rita Skeeter from Goblet of Fire, so the idea that she might write a salacious account of Dumbledore’s life isn’t earth-shattering.
Also, since the Harry’s Voldie-sense is going to play a role in the next film, it should play into this one as well. Harry will do the neck twitch while he is upstairs alone with Nagini.
Scene: Xenophilius Lovegood & The Tale of the Three Brothers
When Hermione and Harry are going over all the places that the sign of the Deathly Hallows has appeared, there will be one added example: Harry will comment that he thinks he saw it on the Horcrux ring, though it was badly damaged. This will set up the reveal of the Resurrection Stone in the next film.
The rest of this part will play out the way that it does in the film, save one dialogue change. When Xenophilius is identifying the three Deathly Hallows, he will identify the third Hallow as “Death’s Cloak of Invisibility”. Simply referring to it as “the” Cloak of Invisibility is confusing, as Philosopher’s Stone clearly set up that Harry’s cloak is not the only one is existence. It’s also not worth throwing the technical details of the Cloak at the audience if the Master of Death dynamic isn’t going to get a full exploration.
Xenophilius saying Voldemort’s name before the Death Eaters arrive can remain. It’s a menacing moment even without the Taboo being part of the film.
Scene: Malfoy Manner
There will be one more dialogue change when Ron tells Dobby where to go.
RON: Shell Cottage, on the outskirts of Tinworth. [Glances at Harry.] That’s where Lupin and Tonks are hiding.
Conclusion
And thus, we reach the conclusion of Part I. While there is still a lot to go through, I believe that this version will require less prior book knowledge from the audience to fully make sense.
The Deathly Hallows: Part 2
This film is basically three long action scenes spliced together, so the changes needed here are all quite minor.
Scene: Shell Cottage
Lupin and Tonks will replace Bill and Fleur here. In the first shot showing them, one of them should be holding baby Teddy.
After the talk with Griphook, there will be a slight change to the dialogue that reminds the audience of the status of the story.
HERMIONE: Are you thinking there’s a Horcrux in Bellatrix’s vault?
HARRY: Well, she was terrified when she thought we’d been in there. She kept asking you what else we’d taken. I bet you anything there’s a Horcrux in there, another piece of his soul.
RON: Can’t be the snake. It must be Hufflepuff’s cup or something owned by Ravenclaw.
HARRY: Exactly. Let’s find it and destroy it, and then we’re one step closer to killing him.
Scene: The Last Hiding Place
Another small dialogue change here. When Harry confirms that the Horcrux is at Hogwarts, he’ll say:
HARRY: There’s more. The Ravenclaw Horcrux is at Hogwarts.
HERMIONE: What? You saw it?
HARRY: I saw the castle, and the ghost of the Gray Lady. We have to go there now!
Scene: The Missing Mirror
Hermione sees the mirror in the Hog’s Head. Rather than the movie version, where it is one mirror with a shard missing, it will be a twin of the one Sirius gave Harry. The dialogue with Aberforth about how he obtained it can remain as-is.
Since the Dumbledore subplot is being cut, the dialogue persuading Aberforth to help Harry and the others access the castle needs to be trimmed down.
ABERFORTH: What makes you think you can trust him? What makes you think you can believe anything my brother told you? In all the time you knew him, did he ever mention my name? Did he ever mention hers?
HARRY: I wish I’d known him better. I really do. I wish I could hear him speak again, say anything. But he’s gone now, and I need to finish what he started. I trusted the man I knew. And to honor his wishes, we need to get into the castle.
I’d also recommend cutting Hermione’s question about Ariana. Aberforth’s answer again connects to the Dumbledore subplot. Having Hermione thank Aberforth and tell Harry she doesn’t think he’s really given up should stay, as it sets up Aberforth’s return during the Battle of Hogwarts.
Scene: The Lost Diadem
Luna, Cho, and Dean Thomas need to be removed from the gathering of students inside the Room of Requirement. None of them should be at the school. Luna was just in Death Eater custody, Dean is a Muggle-born, and Cho should have graduated already. While it’s possible that they snuck in through the secret passage to help the student resistance, that then opens the question of how Harry couldn’t have found out about this secret passage from Luna back at Shell Cottage.
The scene where Harry polls the class about the last Horcrux’s location will be cut. The reveal that the Horcux is the Lost Diadem will come from the Gray Lady herself. Instead, Harry will start to ask the student resistance where in the castle he can find the Gray Lady, only for Ginny to arrive at that moment.
Scene: The Sacking of Severus Snape
As mentioned above, this is where Cho, Luna, and Dean can arrive at the school with the rest of the Order. Bill and Fleur will be absent.
Scene: The Battle of Hogwarts
After parting ways with Hermione and Ron, Harry will be approached by Luna, who says she heard he was looking for the Gray Lady. She can then lead him straight to the ghost.
No change would be made to the actual conversation with the Gray Lady. The audience already knows that Harry needs to find a relic of Ravenclaw, and the conversation as-is is enough to connect to dots for those who don’t immediately make the connection that the diadem is the Horcrux.
Scene: The Elder Wand
In this iteration, the audience and the characters already know Nagini is the last (known) Horcrux, so the line where Harry spells out that fact can be cut.
Scene: The Forest Again
Due to the lack of focus on the Master of Death dynamic, we’ve lost the scene from the book where Harry (correctly) assumes that Dumbledore hid the Resurrection Stone inside the Snitch. The contents of the Snitch will therefore be tweaked. The entire ring Horcrux will be in revealed when the Snitch opens. Harry will be briefly puzzled; then, as understanding dawns, he will pry the Resurrection Stone off of the ring (as which point we get the line from the film).
Conclusion
And that’s the last change. Everything else can play out as it does in the original film.
Final Thoughts
That was quite the journey, wasn’t it?
I believe that the described revisions, while extensive, were within the power of the filmmakers to plan out prior to making any of the latter four films. I am working with the benefit of hindsight, of course. Criticizing years after the fact it always easier than working under the pressures of time and studio mandates.
Either way, I hope that you all had fun. Perhaps some of you will have also learned something worthwhile.
What’s Next
We’re going to another iconic franchise next: Star Wars.
The Obi-Wan Kenobi series is still fresh in our minds. Suffice it to say, it did not please everyone. While I have not watched the series personally, I have noticed a pattern to the feedback in the various reviews. I think that the creators had a specific idea in mind, yet sadly, they Missed the Mark.
So, join me on Labor Day (September 5th), as we dive into Part 0 of Missed the Mark: Obi-Wan Kenobi. I’ll see you all then.